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Tuesday, May 10th, 2005

Time:11:06 pm.
Mood: bored.
Summer has been almost unbearably dull. Honestly, there has been nothing at all to write about. Bella and Cissa shop and sometimes ask me along, but other than that... Well, that's not quite true. Recently there's been quite a lot of visiters around the house. But most of them are friends of Bella and Cissa and while some of them are quite lovely people, I don't feel comfortable intruding on them. So I've mainly spent these hols up in my room or walking around the grounds.

Bella is throwing some kind of party soon, though. That should be fun. I'll get to meet Marlene in a proper, formal way. And I've heard rumours of firewhiskey, so maybe I can get drunk and pass out if it becomes too unbearable. So things are looking up!

There is one thing I would like to happen: I want to see Benjy. I miss him a lot. But Mother and Father are still adamantly opposed to it. I guess I'll have to wait until the new term starts.
Comments: Read 8 orAdd Your Own.

Monday, January 24th, 1977

Time:1:35 pm.
Mood: stressed.
Back at Hogwarts yet again. The hols were alright... I spent a while with Davey and his crazy family. I love them to death, they're so much fun! Completely different than most pureblood families I know. There's so much less formality, nobody scheming and backstabbing. The fights happened all up front, and the affection they show each other is so unrestrained. When I have a family of my own, it want it to be like that. Well, hopefully with less insane people, but I guess I can't be picky.

I got to spend a little time with Marlene, too. Thanks for everything, the advice and all. I wish we had gotten to see each other more, but we were both pretty busy.

Alecto's party was... interesting. I think I was the only sober one there by the end. A party full of drunk purebloods is certainly... an experience.

But now I'm back at Hogwarts. Bloody HELL. I think the professors have set a new goal for themselves, a competition of sorts. The rules are simple: See how much work you can assign the fifth years before they all either drop out, have mental breakdowns, or commit suicide. The professor who loses the most students by the time O.W.L.s roll around is the winner.

Someone please wake me up when this is over.
Comments: Read 4 orAdd Your Own.

Tuesday, December 21st, 1976

Time:1:54 pm.
Mood: moody.
Holidays with the Blacks. Not as terrible as it could be, but it nevertheless reminds me why I decided to call it a miss last year.

Mother and Father keep asking me why did I ever let that charming Lestrange boy go? Is there any chance at all that I might change my mind? He comes from ever so good a family. It's almost as bad as the classic "Mudblood boys aren't worthy of breathing the same air as our daughter" tirade, but not quite at the level of the "Andromeda, don't you dare shame our family by even thinking about dating another Muggle, young lady!" rant. It wouldn't be so bad, except Bella and Cissa keep agreeing with them and insinuating the same things.

Guys, I have a better idea. Instead of trying to get me back with Rabastan, (it's never going to happen. Ever.) why don't you go about finding me a decent Pureblood boy? If you can find me one who isn't a complete slimey berk, maybe I'll consider it.
Comments: Read 12 orAdd Your Own.

Tuesday, December 7th, 1976

Subject:(note: I'm guessing at the date here, I really have no idea)
Time:8:49 pm.
Mood: frustrated.

Reggie and Bella were upset with me for breaking up with Lestrange. They were giving me the usual spiel about "his good, well off family" and how I should ask him to take me back. And then they completely lost it when they found out that Sirius and I are friends again.

I know they were looking out for me in their own way, but I will never understand how they can place happiness below social status, blood above love. I just wish I could be on good terms with everyone in my family without it becoming a huge issue. Reg, Bella, I love you guys, I do. You're my family. But Sirius is my cousin, whether the rest of the Blacks like it or not, and I love him, too. That's not something that's going to change.

I'm going to the pitch. I need to let off some of this steam.
Comments: Read 7 orAdd Your Own.

Sunday, November 28th, 1976

Time:2:59 pm.
Mood: giddy.
Written and immediately ripped outCollapse )

(added afterwords and left in)

Winter is almost here. I know sometimes Muggles think of it as a time of death, but is doesn't feel like it to me. It feels like a time of change. Of letting go of the past and moving on to the future. I haven't felt this free in months. I feel like doing something crazy. Sirius, are you up for that? I think we need to make up for lost time.
Comments: Add Your Own.

Saturday, November 27th, 1976

Time:1:33 am.
Mood: devious.
I broke up with Rabastan today.

It was hard, yes. But after his atrocious behavior the other day, I was forced to see that our love was not meant to be. When I told him of my decision, he appologized and begged me to change my mind, but I held firm. I hated to see the tears in his eyes when I broke his heart... But some differences are too big. And quite frankly, I don't value pure blood the way he does. Never have, never will.

I'm sorry, Rabastan. We can still be friends, right?
Comments: Read 26 orAdd Your Own.

Thursday, November 25th, 1976

Time:11:56 am.
Mood: distressed.
Yesterday was very distressing. To anyone who was offended, I'm so sorry about everything my boyfriend said. Most of it was completely uncalled for, and I plan to speak to him about it. I know that he is under a lot of stress and truly isn't himself. I'm apologizing on his behalf.

I'm a little hurt, though, that he didn't respect my wishes and feelings. I don't understand how he could say those things to my friends when he knows how much it bothers me. He's always so wonderful to me when we're together, I'm so confused as to why he would do something like this.

Rabastan, love, we need to talk about this.
Comments: Read 16 orAdd Your Own.

Saturday, October 23rd, 1976

Time:9:57 pm.
Mood: chipper.
Stomping Hufflepuff into the dirt last weekend was very satisfying (Sorry, Benjy, but it was bound to happen. I mean, we have the greatest Keeper ever, what can I say? <3) One match down, two to go until Ravenclaw gets the Cup!

I'm so excited for the Ball next week. My costume is going to be fanTASTIC. Benjy, we have to get together to make sure we match. I have the greatest idea for what we should go as! But I want to make sure you like it before I start making them.

Aside from that, life has been pretty quiet. Astronomy is absolutely HORRID, as is Charms, but Potions seems to be going well. With some luck I can manage a decent O.W.L. in that. And Benjy, if you have time to help me with Astronomy...? That would be wonderful.
Comments: Read 4 orAdd Your Own.

Wednesday, September 1st, 1976

Time:10:52 pm.
Mood: loved.
Hogwarts is back in session. Another year, another fresh bunch of firsties, another season of Quidditch. Ravenclaw is going to completely DOMINATE the pitch this year.

The best part of my day was definitely leaping into Benjy's arms after spending all summer apart. I know my family disapproves of him, but if they could just look into his eyes and see what I see, I'm sure they'd change their minds. We spent the train ride making out catching up. I could kiss him forever. He's got the greatest lips.

Which I might have to find him and work on. My roommates are already studying for O.W.L.s in here, and I'm quite happy to deny their existence for another few weeks, at least. Off to Hufflepuff with me.
Comments: Read 40 orAdd Your Own.

Tuesday, August 10th, 1976

Time:12:07 am.
Mood: My head STILL hurts.
I had the wickedest hangover when I woke up this morning.

Marlene was a nice girl. I hope to see more of her in the future. I just can't believe she invited Sirius without warning us first. When he and Remus showed up on that ridiculous motorcycle... Merlin help me.

Anyway, he didn't stay long. After he left we played I Never, but I can't really remember what happened. I must have had more to drink than I thought before the game even started. Bella, Severus, anyone, did I make too big a fool of myself?
Comments: Read 2 orAdd Your Own.

Monday, June 21st, 1976

Subject:Owl Post
Time:1:58 am.
Mood: depressed.
Owl to Benjy FenwickCollapse )
Comments: Add Your Own.

Friday, June 18th, 1976

Time:4:04 am.
Mood: frustrated.
Bloody wonderful. Mother and Father decided I can't see Benjy this summer without even TALKING to me about it! I'm so angry now I just don't even know what to do! What makes it worse is I'm fairly certain they talked to Cissa and Bella before deciding.

That is so NOT ON. My own sisters going behind my back to conspire so I can't see my boyfriend. They get to see their boyfriends all they want, get to spend all the time in the world with any boy they like, but when it comes to me, oh Merlin, no! Can't let little Ands make her own decissions, can't let baby Ands do bloody ANYTHING.

Cissa, Bella, I know you hate him, but please, please help me. I'm sure if you went to Mother and Father and told tbem that he's not asx bad as you said they'd change their minds. Please, I'm asking you as a sister.
Comments: Read 23 orAdd Your Own.

Sunday, June 13th, 1976

Time:8:05 pm.
Mood: quiet.
Praise Merlin for summer vacation. All the tension from the OWLs and the NEWTs was making me really cranky.

It's quite strange that Mum and Dad haven't been yelling at me since I got home. I should have made up with them sooner.

Haven't really done much. So far I've stayed in my room sleeping most of the time. I'd forgotten how nice it can be to have a room of my own, some privacy and quiet. The girls in my dorm were getting quite excited toward the end of term, which meant a lot of gossip the like. I'd nearly forgotten what silence sounds like.

I wonder if I'll get to see Benjy at all...
Comments: Read 11 orAdd Your Own.

Friday, April 16th, 1976

Time:1:32 pm.
Mood: aggravated.
I'd hoped McG had forgotten about these journals. Really, life was much better when I didn't have to interact with Sirius... But I guess it was too much to wish for.

What to say? Patching things up with my family has been going well. Benjy's as sweet as ever. Quidditch practice is exhausting.

Really, there's nothing to say that hasn't been said before. Bloody journals.
Comments: Read 8 orAdd Your Own.

Sunday, February 15th, 1976

Time:11:40 pm.
Mood: drained.
Sirius showed his true colors the other day. He always acted so nice to me, but now that I decide to explore different opinions he treats me like I'm dirt. Well, who wants a cousin like that, anyway? I've got the rest of my family now, not to mention the delightful Rabastan Lestrange has extended the hand of friendship. What more could I need?

I woke up yesterday feeling too stressed sick to get up. Just my luck to be ill on Valentine's day. I never left the dorms, just stayed in bed and tried to get some rest. I think it helped... I feel a lot better today. I just hope everyone else's day went better than mine.

Benjy, I'm sorry I didn't get to see you yesterday. Come find me and I'll give you your Valentine's day gift, ok?
Comments: Read 8 orAdd Your Own.

Saturday, February 14th, 1976

Subject:Written at midnight, ripped out immediately afterward
Time:10:54 pm.
Mood: frustrated.
Andromeda gets her feelings downCollapse )

Sunday, January 18th, 1976

Time:2:51 pm.
Mood: discontent.
Have I ever mentioned how glad I am that I'm not a 5th year yet? Davey's going mad over the fact that he's missing classes to recover. He seems to think he's going to fail all his O.W.L.s. Praise Merlin I'm only a 4th year...

I've been doing a lot of thinking lately, and I've been acting rather spoiled. I've been so ungrateful to my family and everything they've done for me... I'm going to do my best to make it up to all of them. Bella, did you want me to attend a meeting with you...?

I hope I get to see more of Benjy this semester.
Comments: Read 41 orAdd Your Own.

Tuesday, January 6th, 1976

Time:4:54 pm.
Mood: excited.
Well, the hols are over. Which means everyone is back at Hogwarts. It's a mixed blessing. It's great to have Sirius around again, and Bertha and Gideon... Especially Benjy. I missed everyone, and I expect full holiday reports from you all! On the other hand, the Slytherins are back, too. Wonderful.

Anyway, Hooch told me that Quidditch is officially reschedualed! It might end up being on Friday rather than Saturday, depending on whether Hogsmead is this weekend or not, but the game will happen sometime this week! FINALLY. I've been wanting to get back on the pitch all break, but I had no one to practice with. I'm sure Davey would have volunteered, but... Well, I wanted to have this be an injury free Christmas.

Quidditch! YES!
Comments: Read 7 orAdd Your Own.

Sunday, December 28th, 1975

Time:8:02 pm.
Mood: content.
Well, Christmas was fun. Thank you everyone who got me gifts! I loved them!

I wonder how the Pureblood Convention is going? So many pureblood families all in one place... I'm so glad I stayed here. It's less... stressful with them gone.

Speaking of, the holiday spirit has worked wonders. I'm not half as on edge as I was before. We should get breaks from school more often.

I miss Benjy, though.

Gideon, any news on Quidditch?
Comments: Add Your Own.

Sunday, December 14th, 1975

Time:6:51 pm.
Mood: distressed.
Does anyone else ever feel like there's just more going on that any one person can be expected to handle? I don't think it's possible to fit any more emotions in me. I'm just... feeling really stressed right now.

Davey, are you feeling ok?
Comments: Read 4 orAdd Your Own.

LiveJournal for Andromeda Black.

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